Host Miles Teller portrayed both Jonathan and Drew Scott — the Property Brothers from the show of the same name — as the twins showed up at the White House to help Donald Trump remodel the structure on “Saturday Night Live.”
Americans have been aghast at watching Trump demolish the East Wing to build a ballroom, and the skit managed to work in ICE, the movie theater demolition, Melania’s decorating style and Trump’s thirst for a third term.
“This week, we’re taking on our biggest challenge yet — building the new White House ballroom,” announced Teller. “Donald and Melania moved into this house nine years ago. They were evicted for four years, but they moved back in. Donald has a strong eye for interior design.”
“I put these gold urns everywhere,” said James Austin Johnson as Trump.
“Like a hundred in every room. That makes me happy. It’s very important to be happy these days. Really dark stuff happening in the world. Some of it is me. And here’s a crown I just got from my trip to Asia. Nothing says democracy like a crown, right?,” Johnson’s Trump said.
Teller then takes a tour of the White House with the Trumps, commenting on Melania’s taste. “She’s got a style all her own. I love these Halloween decorations you put up.”
“Those are for Christmas,” deadpanned Melania, played by Chloe Fineman.
“The Trumps have already made a few subtle changes to the house,” Teller explained.
“Donald put a painting of himself as a soldier from ‘Halo,’” Melania pointed out.
Melania explained that the remodeling is taking place because the house is “only 55,000 square feet” and they need a ballroom, because “Donald, he loves to dance.”
“I’m a terrific dancer. Terrific dancer. Just ask your eyes. Right?,” said Trump.
The Property Brothers said they asked Donald what his budget was and he said, “Between $350 million and infinity.”
Trump then told the brothers he wants to construct a ring for MMA fights and proposes hosting “bum fights.”
“Official ones but also casual fights in the backyard, you know what I’m talking about? Two mentally ill guys just whaling on each other. Do bum fights again. Remember bum fights? We love bum fights!,” Trump exclaimed.
“It will be ready just in time for my third term. We want this to be our forever home. Because we’re not leaving. We’re going to be doing something called coup,” Trump added.
As they end their White House tour, Teller said, “I guess the only thing left is the payment for the construction.”
“Aren’t you guys from Canada?” Trump asked before yelling “ICE!” as agents stormed the room. “There goes ICE. We like them. Spooky, very spooky. It’s a very spooky secret police thing.”
“‘The Property Brothers.’ Only on HGTV and Truth Social,” the announcer concluded.
Watch the full segment below:
